A Black and White State of Mind

Updated on Aug 12, 2014
white white vest TheySkens Theory vest - black rag & bone jeans
White-white-vest-theyskens-theory-vest-black-rag-bone-jeans Black-rag-bone-jeans-heather-gray-ribbed-tank-helmut-lang-top Black-rag-bone-jeans-heather-gray-ribbed-tank-helmut-lang-top Black-rag-bone-jeans-heather-gray-ribbed-tank-helmut-lang-top
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MeganJedlinski 's Thoughts:

Black and white. Love how it makes me feel when I wear it…don’t always love how I feel when I think it.

I think psychology writer, Steven Handel, hits the nail on the head, “We lose in black and white thinking because we are never going to be everything we want to be. We’re always going to be lacking something if we’re trying to measure ourselves on some black-and-white scale where x is good and y is not good. We’re never going to be able to be completely x. It doesn’t happen, because we’re human – we’re unfinished – and we’re not simple. Our tendency is to think we must have something, or we must do something, or life must be a certain way – or it will be awful.”

Does this way of thinking sound familiar? It hits hard here. For as long as I can remember, much of my life played out on a scale of extremes. If I didn’t get an A, I failed and was clearly a horrible student. If I didn’t win MVP in my sport, I must have been a bad player and probably shouldn’t bother going out for the team next year. If I had a couple of cookies, I might as well eat the whole box. If I don’t complete all my morning tasks by noon, I might as well call it a day and hope that tomorrow I can be more productive.

On the flip-side, when things go well or turn out how I hoped they would, I’m on cloud nine. I feel like I’m on top of the world and can accomplish anything! I can really only describe it as a natural high. I feel confident, proud and optimistic. Unfortunately, my moments of extreme happiness are usually cut short by remembering an area of myself or my life that is not going quite according to “plan” :/ .

Of course there are times when black and white thinking is not such a bad thing, but when it takes over your state of mind, it’s no way to live. Thankfully, I’m at a point that I can acknowledge this and be aware of when I start thinking in extremes. I’ve come to accept and appreciate the fact that I am unfinished, that I’m not exactly where I want to be and that I will always be a work in progress. I’ve learned that finding the grey area in life, relationships and myself helps make life more manageable and more enjoyable. I know that I’ve got a ways to go with this new way of thinking, but you know what? I’m okay with that :).

Speaking of extremes, one area where I find extremes completely acceptable is when it comes to bargain shopping. If somethings on sale, great, but if it’s on clearance or you’re telling me I get to take an additional amount off the sale price? Well now you’ve got my attention!

That’s why, in all honesty, it’s hard for me to shop stores other than T.J. Maxx, Marshalls and Homegoods unless I see something I really love at another retailer (which is why I’m so excited to be a part of Project Fab for Marshalls and honored to be a finalist for this month’s Maxxinista contest!). There has never been a time where I bought something from one of the TJX stores and found it cheaper somewhere else. It just doesn’t happen. On the other hand, there have been plenty of times where I find something at a TJX store for cheaper than other stores. And sometimes not just cheaper, but seriously, crazy, do I need to get my eyes checked cheaper.

For instance, this Theysken’s Theory vest which was originally $495. No thanks, I’ll take it for $39 though. Oh and this cute everyday Helmut Lang ribbed tank retailing for $80? How about $10? :D Not to mention I found these gems out in Boston so there was no sales tax either!!

Comments (6)

larisa_s on December 24
awesome outfit <3
fresh styling!
CarefreeContessa on August 12
great versatile vest
bkgurl36 on August 12
Cute Vest
AgataP on August 12 via iPhone mobile device icon
love your vest and bag
Lucyss on August 12
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